I created a (pre-new-years) resolution awhile back, to do at least 10 min. of Yoga every morning.
I love it. Especially when I got really sick- I found some routines that help with colds and it really did relieve my congestion (even if it was only for an hour or so). I like doing yoga in the morning, because it really helps me focus on what I'd like to contribute to the day, and what I'd like to accomplish. I will defiantly extend my AM Yoga practice into the new year!
I do prefer taking Yoga in a class with an instructor that can correct my form- and shame me into doing the full hour practice). Classes get a little expensive, so I am glad Youtube has a great selection of free routines.
Natalli let me come to the birth of her twins. It was awesome- I got to play hooky from work and everything. These babies are something else, and my sister is champ. I can't believe she juggles these babies AND a 1.5 year old.
We don't photograph well together- our engagement shoot was scarring.
I'm excited for fall. I'm excited to start focusing this blog as an online sketchbook of sorts. Get ready for some random art.
7/29/13
Looks like I stopped blogging for a little bit. I had a few career prospects that I was extremely excited about- and then they fell through. I think I felt a little like a failure, because I was so vocal about quitting my teaching job and it turns out I will still be teaching this year. Talk about major disappointment. I'm amazed though at how good (really good) things come when I'm faced disappointment.
I got the coolest opportunity to teach in Europe this summer. My coworkers were wonderful and taught me so much in the 15 days I spent with them. Just being in places like Vienna and Prague inspired me to consider new and different options for my future career. Options that may take a little longer than previous dreams. I just need to work hard and be patient. I need to be grateful for a job this year, and I need to use this time to prepare myself for the adventures that are ahead. Mostly, I need to believe in my ability to create and I need to start creating. I will work this year on bringing ideas to fruition- so often I quit a project because it's not going the way I imagined. I think there is potential in that space to rework and push myself.
Recent projects:
Blake and I designed this bookshelf. Blake and my dad put together the metal frame (using old bed frames). I really wanted to help with the brazing, but they completed that while I was in Europe. I sanded/finished the wood pieces so I'm claiming creation credit too ;)
Carving some block prints for fabric stamping. I like the positive and negative space deign, but should have cleaned up the areas around the carving. The extra marks just ended up looking a little messy. It was a fun exercise and I will probably make a throw pillow out of the fabric.
Some say that Jr. High students are not mature. I beg to differ. This week they are all participating in Sex Ed (ahhhem abstinence)- meaning just a lot of gross photos of STDs to "scare" kids from having sex) politics aside, my students are processing the information in very mature manner.
Proof:
My computer reverses the image so I will translate:
Boobies + balls = good time
Herpies virgin
and my favorites:
Merp :) Herps :)
Boobies + Balls = transestite (I think they mean transvestite)
Why on the back of a ruler? Well, some genius decided it would be a good idea to name an art supply company (that serves the majority of US school districts) "Dick Blick". It is stamped on all of the rulers. Every project that involves a ruler, I wait to listen as students discover what happens when you cross the B off of the name. They feel like they have created a real winner of a joke- and that they are the first to discover it. To see the joy of discovery on their faces helps me know I've done my job.
Just more reassurance that the future is in great hands.
We did an early morning photo shoot for little bro, Keaton's Senior photos.
I really hope my kids get some of these cute Hill genes (ahem- HAIR) and some Smith facial expressions.
Then Eryn and I went to the farmer's market and partook of the delicious and filling vegan french toast. I was a little scared to try VEGAN french toast- but it was truly delicious and super filling. Plus, it always feels great to dig into something that is good for me. Maybe I'll look into creating this little ditty at home??
April = the district art show. I remember going with my parents to see the warm and cool color fish I painted when I was in 2nd grade (my best work came out of that year) it was very avant-garde. I got to see my students displaying their work on the same walls and it was a little bitter sweet.
From our watercolor unit.
I decided to quit teaching. February was a strange and dark month for me- feeling restless, feeling lost, with out much direction or purpose. March was really frustrating, as I went back and forth between wondering if I wanted to quit because teaching is (really) hard or if I want to quit to follow a truer path for myself.
My Mentor & Friend Shalei- Best heart on earth.
1. I keep getting the feeling that I need to be doing something that focuses on my art making. I just don't think I can ignore that feeling anymore.
2. Fear will keep me from experiencing some failure, but will ultimately keep me from realizing my full potential- and that is a BIG failure. I need to be brave.
3. To quote Rent- "No day but today". Lol- Am I right? What am I waiting for?? I can't completely drop everything today to journey on my creative quest but I can start taking some real leaps of faith...
I talked to my principal and told him I am not coming back next year. So scary. I don't have a job lined up. Blake is still in school. I just knew I had to do it. I just know for now, I need something that will pay the billz and give me enough time to work on art (teaching takes up sooooooo much time). I was hoping that something might work out with my part time job- but it doesn't look like that will be happening any time soon, but I will find something. I am also taking a couple classes to prep me for my graduate degree!!! My program conveniently starts when Blake graduates. In the meantime, I am trying to enjoy the last few weeks of teaching and squeeze some art making in for myself.
Some student work:
tttttasty-tasty
Pencil & Charcoal
These are the students that make teaching art worth it. Especially the students from last year, who are now at the high school, coming up to me and telling me that I helped them find some confidence in their art. I'm gonna miss that. A LOT.
I love Trader Joes. Holla at the Tropical Fruit Floes (the word flow or floe in this case, will always remind me of a period, but they are really the most amazing popsicles), and chocolate covered potato chips, and cheap coconut oil and tripple ginger cookies. This little gem is stocked right at the cash register and I always debate getting it, like- real inner turmoil. I got it this week and it was everything I hoped it would be. Bonus- the wrapper is cute and well designed packaging always makes the product better tasting.
Blake and I had some leftover wood so I made a little chalkboard out of it. I like having something new to hang in our little entryway. I slowed down on making things lately and it feels good to finish a project. I'm not sure if its because I decided to stop taking my adderall or what, but my head and motivation have been in such a foggy place the last few weeks.
We completed our table setting of Fiestaware this weekend. We got a couple sets for our wedding and we wanted to have enough to serve four, so we randomly decided to do it this weekend. Luckily Kohls had them on sale- my Mom must have been praying for me to find a "miracle shopping deal", Heaven really knows how to hook my mom up with a sale- especially from Kohls. It took me soooooooooooo long to pick the other two colors. There were so many great options. I know plates are just things, but I am glad Blake understands (at least most of the time) my passion and desire to curate the color in our life.
Blake's parents took us on a cruise for spring break. We drove over to CA with his grandma, dad and little brother. Blake surprised me and played a round of the Minister's Cat (Smith family favorite). This has never happened before. Blake and I had a huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuge fight seconds before getting in the car, it was really awkward trying to hide my tears from his family (read: smother my hysterical sobbing into a sweaty blanket while pretending to sleep)... so I think he played the game to make me feel better. Blake and I are both very passionate, opinionated and sassy- this leads to some intense shouting matches. I really think there are few people who could be married to either of us! I am so glad I found someone who can take on my drama and dish a little back. Our relationship has taught us how to be a little more patient, accepting and forgiving. Blake is the coolest, and I'm glad I got to spend so much time with him last week.
The Cruise was the same on we did for our honeymoon, but the change in company brought new experiences. For example, sharing a room with Blake's little brother forced us to get a little creative in the love department. Pretty funny.
Seeeeester's in law.
By the end of the cruise we were more than ready to go home. I wanted my own house, healthy food, and Major Tom. I am still cringing at how much crap I ate, and sedentary I was.
Attempting a glamour shot (inspired by my hair in 2004)- Blake feeling embarrassed of me.
In other news, we got a second cat (Ziggy Stardust). We thought he would be great companion for Major Tom because we are never home these days. Don't be fooled by this photo, they really hate each other. I am really depressed about it. We are crossing our fingers that they will soon bond and love each other.
I started reading Twyla Tharp's "The Creative Habit" this weekend. The main idea is that being creative is a matter of hard work.
After each chapter, Tharp encourages the reader to participate in some activities that will exersize creativity. The first chapters she talks about rituals. Turning something into a ritual means we are investing reverence in and finding comfort, confidence, ad sefety as we begin an activity. These rituals can help us push away the fear and distractions and get to work!
Starting to create is sometimes the hardest part, and fear and distractions really work against us acting on the inspiration to create. Today's R.S. lesson was on the Holy Ghost. I think creative inspiration and the Holy Ghost are one in the same. Truth speaks to the soul, it tells it to act and create. The medium is different for different people. Fear keeps me from acting on truth and inspiration. Here are the big fears that keep me from creating (this is not an attempt to fish for compliments! I am just making an honest record of how I feel now):
1. What will other artists/designers think of my work? Will they think I am kidding myself? Will they make fun of my work or just hate it?
2. What if my work is not authentic? I posted a great quote about originality vs. authentic HERE. I am not afraid that my work will look like anyone else's ...because inevitably it will. I fear that my work isn't true to me. That it isn't honestly from my heart and soul. Maybe I'm afraid to open up that much, and maybe I don't know how.
3. I don't have enough training or education. That I am OK at a lot of stuff, but not great at anything. This is really silly, I know, because I just need to keep practicing! I also need to continue
4. I fear that I lack direction and purpose...which is kind of the same as #2.
5. I fear that I can't bring my ideas to fruition. I'll be honest, I have some really good ideas. I am terrified to even begin on them, because I feel that I lack the skill to bring them to life. Tharp quotes Leon Battista Alberti, "Errors accumulate in the sketches and compound in the model." She then goes on to say, "But better an imperfect dome in Florence than cathedrals in the clouds".
It is important to know what I fear, so I can vanquish them.
If any of the family and friends who read this care to join me in reading this book- I would LOVE to discuss it, and do some of the exercises together. Let me know!
I've been working on this portfolio. I'm not ready to talk too much about why I'm making a portfolio...but I'm seeking some opportunities and taking some risks and it feels empowering and a little scary! I am also feeling grateful for friends who inspire, help and believe in me.
Every year, some of Blake's family heads down to the Tucson Gem Show. He purchased the stones for my ring there- exactly two years ago!
This was my first time- and I am in love!!!
I invited the science teachers on campus to come with me- because they like rocks too. I was nervous for awkward talk on the way down, but it was really fun!
My favorite one! The chartreuse color was rich and velvety in person- this photo does not do it justice.
I purchased this pendant for $10! I am still kicking myself for not buying more- the vendor had a huge variety of unique pendants.
A random gate made out of mattress skeleton. I just thought it was pretty.
Sometimes I get really down about the lack of culture in Arizona. It is good to remember that there are great things in any state, if I'm willing to put some effort into finding them.
