Blake got her (him?) for our one year anniversary. She is a spaz, but I am surprised and how much I love her. I always made fun of enthusiastic pet parents, but now I'm on my way to becoming one. I could not sleep the first night we got her, because I was nervous that she was feeling lonely and scared after being ripped from the comfort of her mother's teat.
It's good for me to be focused on giving love to another creature. For example, first year of marriage and first year of teaching- easily the hardest year of my life. I have discovered that I am really selfish, and pretty prideful and stubborn. These things really stir up a bitter and dark heart, and I've been wallowing in it! Slowly, I am getting to know myself better. I feel like I am beginning to understand (however minutely) love. Love cause me to grow...and there are a lot of growing pains. Growing is good. When I sacrifice my petty-ness (?) to do something for Blake, or my students or even my cat I feel so much better. I feel more alive. I feel more love and acceptance for myself.
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